These very words that are mentioned in wedding ceremonies hold so true when confronting antics within corporate America or at least that’s the wish of many of our so-called colleagues.
After 22 years in corporate America you would think by now I would be use to the “watch what you say”, “don’t say it”, “watch your tone” or the best of them all “just be quiet.” I for one have always had a problem with all these particular responses to issues. According to most of my Caucasian colleagues I get the impression that these responses refer to hostility, aggressiveness and lack of teamwork, which is always a red flag. However, I wonder why can’t they just be viewed a valued opinions, which is what most of their responses are viewed as??
Recently and once again I don’t why I’m amazed but I came across a situation where I felt it necessary to defend myself. As many of you know I’m currently employed within the technology sector. And as I said many of times the celebrity of technology positions are not what they use to be. Here’s the scenario, the company that employs me was upgrading its fax software. A massive email was sent out via the technology group, plus a training schedule and updates. It turned out the upgrade did not apply that morning but later on during the afternoon. A confirmation email had been sent to all users from the vendor stating the upgrade has taken change and their fax numbers have been ported over. Now, remember the communication that had been previously sent. Once the vendor sent out their communication I started to receive a flurry of emails asking me what is going on? Is this spam mail? What’s happening to the current program, etc. etc.? The most famous of these emails came from Human Resources with my boss cc’d informing me that I need better communication skills. She was what I would deemed, hostile (oops that’s one for me ☺). Basically her email stated “what is all of this and how come no one was communicated?” She also went on to give me some suggestions so I can avoid future mishaps as this.
I was pisst. I can’t even try to dress that up, but I did compose myself. I responded to her hostile email with the following:
1) Attachments of the emails previously sent
2) The training schedule
3) Updates
I also went on tell her that maybe she should send some communication stating, it’s the users personal responsibility to pay attention to emails from the technology group. Obviously all the users including her did not! She did not immediately respond directly to me, but contacted my boss who was also cc’d on the emails.
Here’s what happened next. For the sake of keeping this as true as possible, I’m going to write this as in screenplay format ☺
Scene 1 – Blacktina is confronted by her boss.
Crazy White Boss: Blacktina OMG what are you doing?
Blacktina: What are you talking about?
Crazy White Boss: The email you sent to HR. That wasn’t necessary.
Blacktina: Why not? I’m being told I didn’t communicate in which I did and they needed to know that communication had been sent.
Crazy White Boss: Blacktina it doesn’t matter if communication had been sent or not. It matters that we get on the ball with it now.
Scene 2 – While Blacktina holds her breath and thanks God for the mute button.
Blacktina: First of all we’re on the ball with this and have always been. Secondly if the communication doesn’t matter then why am I being called on it?
Crazy White Boss: You know HR they always have something to say.
Blacktina: Yes I know. The problem is they’ll have something to say on my review. And I do have the right to defend myself when I’m being told I didn’t do my job.
Crazy White Boss: Yes Blacktina, but it’s not a big deal.
Blacktina: If so then why are you calling me?
Crazy White Boss: I have to go, just be careful on what you send out.
Again I don’t know why I’m amazed. I’m basically suppose to accept an accusation and never ever defend myself and when I do I’m reprimanded. I’ve now been reprimanded for two things that I have done nothing wrong. Maybe someone can explain to me what should I have done?
There are so many layers of variances that people of color have to deal with in corporate America. Many think racism is as simple as black and white but as we all know it’s not that simple. I often hear and read comments how Blacks need to get over what happened 200+ years ago, especially when we talk about reparations. I say, why don’t YOU get over it. See simple crap like what I just experienced is indeed racism. And you may say No it’s not. But check this out if a white person would of responded the way I did, there’s no doubt that they would have been commended, perhaps their suggestion would have been taken into consideration. When I do it or any other person of color it’s perceived as hostile, petty and unnecessary. Some may think I may be sensitive but when I think about it I was called to the carpet twice in less than an hour for no error on my part. Sensitive is the least of my worries. I have to learn so I’m told how to work around these situations. For an educated degreed woman this is one puzzle I am not sure how to solve, nor do I think I want to. If anybody has any suggestions, kindly let me know. Other than that for all the peeps of color hang in there. In the words of MJ “You are not alone.”
